Hi, Colleen.
Around 2016, Milton switched to using a non-gendered, informal approach to salutations. Our rules are roughly outlined below. Good luck!
With the exception of the Formal addressee/salutation types, all Addressee/Salutations use an informal form of greeting. The addressee is determined by constituency hierarchy, title hierarchy, last name alphabetical, first name alphabetical. The word "and" is used to connect names rather than the ampersand. Titles are only used when they are earned. For example, Doctor, Reverend, The Honorable. Suffixes are only used when they are part of a name like II, III, IV, but not MD or PhD.
Married constituents are hierarchied by relationship to the organization. Alumni is the most important constituency group, then trustees, faculty, staff. Title then comes into play to sort who is listed first and second. Who people with equal standing are then alphabetized by last name. In the case of the same last name, alphabetized by first name.
Two alums are always listed as two separate full names connected by the word "and". Other pairings with the same last name are listed as first 1 and first 2 and last name. Anyone with a title or suffix is listed as a separate full name.
For example:
Anna A. Jones '80 and John B. Jones (alum goes first)
Dr. Steven Smith '75 and Helen Q. Rogers '76 (title goes first)
Allan and Susan Jackson (alpha by first with same last name)
Michael R. Jones III '92 and Sarah B. Jones '92 (two alums with same last name, alpha by first)
Janet Hill '92 and Dr. Bob Hill (alum goes first)
Evan Young, Jr. and Millicent Winters (trustee goes first)
Salutations follow the same order as the addressee using nicknames if available, otherwise first name.